It took me 5 years since my first meeting–one that I felt pushed to attend by family members–before I finally was able to stay sober. Those 5 years will always be the worst chapter of my life. I tried everything in my own power to stay sober, but couldn’t and then I’d come back to the rooms again–only to think I was “fixed.” During those 5 years, I racked up two DUIs and endless troubles with family. Finally, I heard myself say “I need help; I can’t do this by myself.” It was a statement I had never uttered during those 5 years. That was the beginning–the beginning of working the Steps for real and earnestly; the beginning of a happy life without alcohol; the beginning of a road to recovery that continues to grow and expand in ways that I never knew possible.
Today I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I, under the influence of alcohol, will absolutely ruin my life, and destroy everything that I hold near and dear. I also know that NOTHING is worth drinking over. I know that whatever I am going through, I can apply the steps and principles I’ve learned in the program and will get through it because the sun always rises, things change, and above all, there’s always hope.