As the Big Book describes, “For most normal folks, drinking means conviviality, companionship and colorful imagination.” That especially holds true during the holidays.
Several years ago our work team holiday party was organized at a local brew pub. I was apprehensive, for obvious reasons. But also, less obvious to me, I discovered a source of apprehension was that I was concerned about my teammates asking me why I wasn’t drinking. The idea that others would be so interested in what I’m doing or not doing at any given time and the realization of the self-centeredness of that made me laugh, actually. As it turns out, while I may have been the only alcoholic at the event, I wasn’t the only person who wasn’t drinking, and NO ONE asked ANY of us why we weren’t drinking. My lesson was this: While I may be sober, my focus on drinking can always come up. Drinking or not drinking (though an issue to me, as an alcoholic) isn’t a big deal to normal drinkers who have the ability to take it or leave it alone.
I’ve also learned to not get put out when I go to a gathering and the bar is fully stocked but the non-alcoholic beverages are harder to come by. (Accept the things I cannot change!) Considerations won’t always be made in social gatherings for those who might not drink. That’s a reality that I’ve seen on many occasions. I don’t have to get bent out of shape; I can just ask the host or waiter for a soda or a water. I’m the alcoholic. I shouldn’t expect the rest of the world to change to suit me; I can adapt to it. (Change the things I can!)
And finally, while I don’t particularly look forward to social events, in general; I try to apply what the BB tells me in Working With Others: “Do not think of what you will get out of the occasion. Think of what you can bring to it.”
Contributed by SD.